Cilicia.com

Here’s the kind of story that illustrates the sort of thing we’ll never understand in Armenia…

Diamond Pizza is right by the corner of Republic Square on Abovyan.  It’s a few stories high, and has a great rooftop patio with a great overview of Republic Square from above.  The pizza is respectable, and a bunch of us had headed up to the rooftop in order to enjoy a bite in great weather.

We finally get settled onto our table – passing up the table with the best view, which also comes with a special fee for sitting there – and start to order.  We are given full menus which go well beyond pizza, but pizza sounds good to most of us.

One of us tries to put in an order for pizza and is told pizza is not sold on the roof.  At moments like this you do a double take and look around for a hidden camera.  There are candid camera style shows in Armenia, by the way, but this apparently wasn’t one of their scripts.  So here is a basic account of the conversation:

Yes, I’d like a yesiminch pizza.

Sorry, pizza is not available on the roof.

What do you mean?  Why??

Well if we sold pizza on the roof, that’s all people would order.

But, isn’t this Diamond Pizza?

Yes.

Um, no really, can we have pizza?

No.

Okay, we’ll need some more time to figure out our order.

Now what can you do in a situation like this but laugh and perhaps plead?  After some laughing and conversation, we are shocked to see a pizza being delivered to a table next to us, and of course we have to protest to the waiter that we want pizza as well.

Excuse me, you just took a pizza to that table.  We’d like pizza as well.

No, you can’t have pizza.

But… why?  You just took them one!

Yes, you can only have a pizza if you are a child or pregnant.

Oh yes, we’re all either children or pregant!

Hmmm, no.

So we didn’t have pizza at Diamond Pizza that evening.