A New Armenia
Most repats can tell you that the vibe in the air has definitely changed in the last few months, but what it means is unknown. This might not be a favored or popular blog with the audiences, but I'm a firm believer that to change something, you need to look at it truthfully. Just as there is an uncertainty of the future of Armenia in the diaspora, there is a confusion in the repat community about the direction of the country they so belovedly returned to so many years ago. The tension in the air, the anger, and lack of respect for one another seems magnified by all the signs that once meant progress. Protests have only brought out more doubt in the people, and clearer divides. Economic progress has led to more pollution and traffic in Yerevan's center with no visible intent to regulate the chaos (starting with noisy clubs in residential areas and ending with the worst gridlock you could ever imagine). But worst among all, prices of everything have skyrocketed, especially food, making it no longer more practical to live here than anywhere else.
I sat with some fellow repats yesterday on a beautiful Sunday afternoon, sitting outdoors on Abovyan drinking tea, something I once considered paradise. We contemplated what it was that changed our experience for the worse and I realized what changed for me. I've been coming to Armenia since 1994, and have lived here for the last 2 years. In the best moments, I remember feeling such an overwhelming feeling of hope and potential that was once limitless. It seems now that the limits are surfacing and they exist dominantly within our own mentality... collectively. The cynicism is outrageous and growing rapidly, affecting everything around us. Even within myself, I feel a hopelessness challenging my primary objective in moving to Armenia, or even my desire to pursue those objectives.
What's the answer? Well, it's not to buck up and leave, that's for sure. The US, while cheaper on some levels, is certainly not the ideal location at this time with it's suffering economy... I wont go down the list. There is no other destination more attractive, which is a sad state of the world to realize at a time like this. So I stay. What on earth do I do to change what's around me, though? My answer... be nice. Smile. Remove hatred from my day. Stop looking at people as though I'm ready to strangle their children (I admit everything), learn to make them laugh instead. Overwhelm people with generosity (element of surprise is powerful). I was in a shoe store yesterday and all the women who worked there were either looking at themselves in the mirror fixing their hair, or frowning on my presence. My friends and I tried to act silly just to crack a smile... unsuccessful (can't win 'em all). But usually just being a freaky spaz to get a laugh is enough to lighten the mood. I suggest we all do the same, because we don't have another Armenia right now. This is it... and we need it to meet our own standards in every way.
I sat with some fellow repats yesterday on a beautiful Sunday afternoon, sitting outdoors on Abovyan drinking tea, something I once considered paradise. We contemplated what it was that changed our experience for the worse and I realized what changed for me. I've been coming to Armenia since 1994, and have lived here for the last 2 years. In the best moments, I remember feeling such an overwhelming feeling of hope and potential that was once limitless. It seems now that the limits are surfacing and they exist dominantly within our own mentality... collectively. The cynicism is outrageous and growing rapidly, affecting everything around us. Even within myself, I feel a hopelessness challenging my primary objective in moving to Armenia, or even my desire to pursue those objectives.
What's the answer? Well, it's not to buck up and leave, that's for sure. The US, while cheaper on some levels, is certainly not the ideal location at this time with it's suffering economy... I wont go down the list. There is no other destination more attractive, which is a sad state of the world to realize at a time like this. So I stay. What on earth do I do to change what's around me, though? My answer... be nice. Smile. Remove hatred from my day. Stop looking at people as though I'm ready to strangle their children (I admit everything), learn to make them laugh instead. Overwhelm people with generosity (element of surprise is powerful). I was in a shoe store yesterday and all the women who worked there were either looking at themselves in the mirror fixing their hair, or frowning on my presence. My friends and I tried to act silly just to crack a smile... unsuccessful (can't win 'em all). But usually just being a freaky spaz to get a laugh is enough to lighten the mood. I suggest we all do the same, because we don't have another Armenia right now. This is it... and we need it to meet our own standards in every way.
posted by Arsineh at 4:52 PM
3 Comments:
Arsineh, you put into words everything I have been feeling. BRAVO! Now, we need to find a solution. I'm thinking, maybe leaving for a while will make me see the HOPE again? I do not know at this point.
I'm starting to feel like the power lies within the hands of the people in the public eye. And it wont take direct attacks to make the change, but subtle commentary on society in Armenia, government and people alike.
My cousin said this.. "Shoosh, wake up and smell the soorj, you're living it! Other people are out there dreaming of being in Hayasdan, and you are there!".... Maybe she is right. :)
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