A visit to Holland

Sorry for the break in logging. I spent ten days in Holland and came back on Saturday morning. This week my dad and my brother are in town. My dad is here for business, my brother came along for fun, to see where his sister is living now. It's his first time in Armenia, so he's spending his time sightseeing. He seems to be having a nice time so far.

For the first couple of days in Holland I walked around like in a bubble - this feeling got less after a few days, but it never went away entirely. I kept feeling detached, like I was observing things from a distance. Usually, when I returned from Armenia I would walk around cultureshocked for the first few days, but somewhat to my surprise, that wasn't the case this time. Maybe because I knew I wouldn't stay and because of this detachment I felt. I should probably rephrase that to: I knew I wouldn't stay and so I kept feeling detached from life in Holland.

There were some things I did enjoy while in Holland: being able to take a warm shower in the morning without having to wait at least an hour until the water is warm enough, reading the morning newspaper over coffee and breakfast, taking the train (and not having to sit in an overcrowded marshrutka!), taking a walk near the sea. But I did miss some things as well: the view of Ararat from our apartment window, the mountains in general (Holland is so flat and there are signs of human presence everywhere you look!) and in a funny way I missed the chaotic traffic in Yerevan. One of the first days I was riding in a car and I caught myself thinking: "Wow! All the drivers keep to the right lane!" Yes, it's true: that is really what I thought!! I guess that's how used I got to Yerevan traffic. And I had to get used to wearing a seat belt again. One time I took a taxi from the train station and I forgot to put the seat belt on. The taxi driver noticed that and waited, because he apparently didn't want to leave with me not wearing the seat belt. He didn't say anything at first however, and I had no clue what he was waiting for! Turned out it was my seat belt!

I met most of my friends again, which was fun, having dinner together, catching up. Fortunately, the weather was great, so we were often able to have lunch or dinner outside in the garden or at an outside cafe. I can't remember the weather in Holland ever having been this nice in late September. Also I sorted out lots of stuff in my old apartment. My brother is living there now and he kindly but decidedly ordered me to clean out more closet space for him. It was surprising how easy it was to make the decision to throw things away now that I hadn't seen or been around them for some time and how easy it was to adjust to my apartment no longer being mine and to being a guest in the same apartment I used to live in for over six years.

It feels really good to be back home in Yerevan. It felt slightly weird being back in Holland, but it also made me realize that my home is no longer there: it is here in Armenia. Already while the plane was descending to Amsterdam Airport, I realized that I was happy I would leave again in ten days. While being back in Holland, I realized how glad I am that I moved to Armenia, how much I have there: good friends, my boyfriend, being able to work on projects that I enjoy working on, that I do with my heart. Not to say that everything in Armenia is always going supersmoothly, but despite that, I generally get much more satisfaction from my life in Armenia.